Homesick

Sorry I haven't written much. I still haven't even finished writing about our journey cross-country and we've been here now for nearly two months.

It's been a busy two months, trying to figure out our way around, exploring new places, working, and all the many other things that go along with a big move. We've taken a trip to Disneyland, checked out the Arizona Science Center, found a mall with a play area and another with a little splash fountain. And still there is so much we have yet to explore.

School started about a month ago. Teachers went back on July 29th and we had students August 4th. Jon is enjoying his job a fair amount, but I am not. I don't belong in a classroom, I belong home with my babies. Only 161 more school days until I can be home with them again. We have pretty much already decided that we will have to find a way to keep me home next year, whether it mean finding a part-time night job or a job working from home, I need to be home with my kids. I realized that today more than ever when Nathan was singing some songs with me and told me he learned them in school, songs that I had taught him and he simply didn't remember me teaching them to him. It broke my heart. :(

And then as I was checking my email my monthly zillow.com report showed up for our MI house. Just seeing the little thumbnail picture brought me to tears. Nathan tells me occasionally that he misses his red room and the backyard.

I just want to go home, back to Michigan, the place I was so desperate to leave just a few months ago. Go home to my happy life of being a stay at home mom, the life where a teacher work day was from 8am-3pm and Jon was home most days by 3:15, a place where teachers are paid a fair salary.

We are literally out of our house 11 hours a day. We leave between 6:30-6:45am and don't arrive home until between 5:15-5:30pm. Our technical school day is 7:30am-4pm but I always have at least a few hours work each night. It is insulting how little we are paid here and how hard we have to work. I don't want to sound like a total whiner, after all most people don't go into teaching for the money, but I don't even want to be a teacher anymore, at least not the kind of teacher that is in a classroom all day.

I pray every day that Jon's job in Michigan decides they need to make the .8 job they offered him full-time. School hasn't started there yet so I hold on to a small sliver of hope even though I know it is useless. If they called we would move back in a heartbeat, I don't know how but we would figure out a way. We have only missed 1 mortgage payment thus far and the offers aren't exactly rolling in. The two short-sale offers have been denied. It'd be easy to get back in our little house that we miss terribly.

Well that is about it for now. I know this post is all over, but what do you expect it is 1:30am after all. I really just needed to get my feeling out so I could stop crying and maybe get some sleep.